I hope you’re enjoying A Tale of Misplaced Loyalty, which I’ll return to in a bit.
These days I’ve been feeling so emotional it’s hard to think straight. Now I’m working on reframing my perspective on things. I’m good at that; putting a positive spin on the situation. I’m equally good at avoiding painful emotions, but now I find myself facing them.
To reframe the matter, I see that it’s ultimately healthy for me to face my painful emotions like fear, sadness, and anger. Due to my temperament and environment, I felt these powerful emotions while growing up, but didn’t have a way of expressing them. Then I put all my efforts into making sure I’d never feel them again (which didn’t work).
Sometimes I don’t think I’ll be able to handle the emotions, but somehow I get through it, and emerge with more resiliency. Now that I think about it, an amazing thing has happened. I don’t have that sick, empty feeling anymore, which always felt like a perpetual loneliness that lived in my solar plexus.
Daring to be open and vulnerable,
at the heart of the emptiness I found courage,
and the confidence to be myself.
image credit: morguefile.com
- Encouraging (gettingbetterman.wordpress.com)