Living unconditionally means living from the inside out, and paradoxically, living from the outside in. It all becomes one. It means becoming truly free. Once we have emotional freedom, then we can really begin to live. Living conditionally — feeling good or bad based on what’s going on around us — is ultimately a form of victim-hood. To let go of the fear of criticism, you have to also let go of the need for approval. Approval and criticism are two sides of the same coin, and to be free, you need to let go of the coin.
Letting go of the vicious cycle of wanting approval and fearing disapproval was the most challenging thing I’ve done, but what I got in return was freedom and life. Now I can feel the creativity flowing, and more importantly, I can express and go with the flow of my creativity. I’ve always wanted to be free of the tyranny of fearing criticism, but I still held on to the sweet taste of approval. Now I realize that the sweetness of approval, and the bitterness of criticism, are both acquired tastes. I can either let go of both, or accept both. Since I still like the feel of approval, I choose to accept both.
Living unconditionally means seeing beyond the personalities and psychological complexes that people carry around with them. It means doing what we know is right for us to do, and letting others do what they know is right for them to do, without emotional manipulation. We no longer need someone else for our emotional sustenance. We become courageous and strong, which is what we need to be in order to live on purpose. It’s not others that we need to fear or answer to, but rather our own True Self that we need to face every day.
image credits: Forgot the Words by Tim Hamilton CC BY-NC-ND 2.0