I believe that the decisions we make in life determine where we end up. In simple terms, if you predominantly make happy decisions for yourself, you end up at a happy place, and if you keep making unhappy decisions, you’ll end up feeling unhappy. Maybe you’re in the same boat as me in that you want to make more decisions based on your inner guidance, rather than influenced by external circumstances and other people.
The Power of Maybe
The best way to make a decision is when you can – with confidence – say yes or no to something, but sometimes you’re not sure, so I think it’s good to be able to say maybe, and realize that maybe actually means “no, for now.” If you’re like me, and sometimes find it hard to say no, then telling yourself maybe can help. I use the GTD system, and put the commitment or decision I’m unsure about on a “Someday/Maybe” list. It’s basically my way of saying no, but still gives me the option of saying yes when the time feels more right.
The Power of Integrity
Sometimes you really do know that you want to do something, and feel enthusiastic about it, but maybe you have doubts, fears, or worries about doing it, and that stops you. In that case, I think it’s good to find a way to push through the fear – using willpower if needed – and do what you want to do. Sometimes it’s the other way around. You know that you don’t want to do something, but fear letting people down, or feel obligated to do it. Again, I think it’s best to honor your true feelings, but this time instead of using your willpower to do it, you make yourself not do it. I believe this will strengthen your sense of personal integrity; give you a backbone, so to speak.
I want to make at least 80% of my decisions from the inside out, and maybe if I need to for some reason, I’ll make 20% of my decisions based on outside circumstances. It’s something I’ve been working on for years, and it’s really starting to pay off.