You know how you can’t really tell you’re physically growing until one day you look in the mirror and think, wow, I look different! Well, emotional growth is similar, and you can’t really tell you’ve grown until you think about something and realize that you feel very different about it. It’s like the old emotions don’t fit or matter as much anymore.
That’s what I’m experiencing a lot of these days. I’ll think about something that used to bother me, or experience something that I’d react to in a certain way, and the main thing is that I’ll either find it amusing, or realize that it doesn’t matter. Sometimes the old emotions are still there, but now I’m supportive of myself about it.
Last year, I was dipping into feelings of despair, and I learned to support myself through it. Now I seldom feel despair, but I do feel angry at times (anger is a step up from despair) and I continue to be my own friend.
We naturally grow emotionally, but sometimes we need to direct the growth by nourishing ourselves with positive feeling experiences. As we grow our good feelings, the bad stuff will fall away like so much dead weight.