When does confidence become recklessness? When does it become arrogance? No one can tell you the answer, because you have to experience it for yourself. Having no confidence makes you timid, but over-confidence can lead to a downfall. My parents represent both ends of the spectrum for me, so I have personality traits of both anxiety and audacity. I do my best to walk the middle way.
The middle way is your way, and you figure it out like bumper bowling. Go too far to the left, it knocks you back to the middle; go too far to the right, it knocks you back to the middle. Eventually you learn to navigate without getting knocked back and forth so much.
Here’s an excerpt from the first post of my blog, written eight years ago.
I’m going to try and have a writing ritual everyday, which means this journal will be an eclectic mix of topics…I began keeping journals a few years ago, and write in them everyday…I’ve focused on having some kind of narrative voice/style/what-have-you.
I have a lot of topics I want to write about; art, life…well, what more is there but art and life? I don’t profess to know anything special about these topics. Quite the opposite, really. The hope is that by writing about it I can clarify my thoughts, and use this electronic medium (wow, I sound like an old man) to communicate with others. And that’s the point of my artistic endeavors anyway; to communicate ideas.
All kinds of extraordinary things have happened from then till now, but the reason I’m pointing this out (to myself, mostly) is to show what it means to have a far-reaching vision. Some of those years went by in a blur, some felt excruciatingly slow, but who I am has always been in one place experiencing each moment.