Last night, I sent my ex-girlfriend a message that represented the closing of a chapter in my life. I know that I’ve changed, because it doesn’t bother me if she replies or not.
There are different scenarios I can imagine. One, she could reply, and we can build a new, positive relationship. Two, she could not reply, because she’s scared or angry, and that’s more harmful to her in the long run. Three, she could realize down the road that she really does have a great guy who truly loves her, and that we could have had a great friendship all along. Whatever the outcome, my love for her will remain constant.
I know that at the heart of it all is the desire for personal freedom. I did my best to have a relationship that respected our individuality. I don’t think anything that has happened needs to get in the way of loving each other. I believe we can create whatever kind of relationship we want.
Ultimately, if she’s not in love with me, then obviously we don’t need to be together. That’s been the confusing part for me; does she love me or not? Well, I’m finally finished worrying about that kind of thing. I’ll love her anyway, and allow her to be exactly as she is.
I’m in a position where I have a comfortable place to live, work, and play. I have people who love and care about me. I have my health and good food to eat. Reaching out to my ex (and to her family) was something that felt right for me to do. I think it’s just as important for them to understand what it means to forgive, forget, love, and accept each other. I’ve grown and benefited greatly from my experience with them, and I want to show my appreciation.
I know it takes time to build trust, and as long as I remain true to myself, things will always work out for me.