I’m using my feelings as proof of my happiness, success, and well-being, rather than looking at conditions and feeling dissatisfied. I see that it’s the best way. It’s called being unconditional, and the other way (being conditional) has only led to anxiety, depression, unhappiness, and worry.
From my experience, unhappiness comes from wanting to control the uncontrollable, and perhaps that’s the real purpose of my feelings of unhappiness and unrest. As I let go more and more of the things I can’t control, I feel happier. I’ve realized that the only thing I can truly control is how I choose to perceive a condition; either in a happy or unhappy way. I can’t control what happens, or what other people do, but I can control how I respond to what happens.
I’ve also realized that most of the time I can’t even control what I think or how I feel about things. That sort of just happens, but I can choose to look at what I think, or how I feel, in a positive or negative way. Much of the anxiety I felt around people was from trying to control my thoughts and feelings. Now, I only control how I wish to perceive myself (whatever I’m thinking, feeling, doing, or experiencing), which is essentially saying that I’m choosing to be my own best friend.