Sometimes I wonder why it’s so quick and easy for me to focus love onto others, but focusing that same love on myself feels foreign. It’s one of those unfamiliar things that I’m devoted to becoming familiar with. As I look upon myself with the same admiration, esteem, friendliness, and respect that I afford others, I feel at peace.
Choosing to no longer seek the approval of (and trying to please) others may be the most challenging thing we ever face. Sometimes anger is our only way out, but when the anger subsides, we can feel the familiar pull of old habits. However (and whenever) it happens, turning the corner is the difference between night and day.
The Great Equalizer
Happiness is the great equalizer. We can never really tell if anyone else is truly happy. We can never truly make anyone else happy unless they really want to be happy.
I have to admit that as focused and (authentically) happy as I am now, through everything I’ve learned and overcome, there’s still pain and resistance to being happy, which requires all of my wisdom (as well as others) in order to find peace. It takes a deep and abiding appreciation of the journey and the process of life. We weren’t born to please others; we were born to be true to ourselves, and the sooner we realize that, the better we’ll feel.
I’m focused on embodying myself these days–really feeling what it means to be me–so I’m not trying to use my intellect to be happy. Intrinsic motivation is the only thing that’s truly fulfilling. Life flows into open spaces.
I’m enjoying art, writing, and music. There’s nothing for me to solve anymore. I’ve gone through the tough stuff, and now all I want to do is appreciate everything.
I know that whatever has gone away can be replaced by something greater. This is what it means to be a (better) man. That’s what it means to be human.
For people who care about living an authentic life, a big and ever present question is, “How do I know I’m on the right track?” First, we have to assume that there’s a right track, otherwise why care about how we want to live? I believe there is a right track, but its shape and direction is between you and your Source.
Sometimes our track (or path, if you will) happens to coincide with what society wants, but that isn’t primary. The most important thing is that we remain true to our path. Maybe from a God’s eye view we can see how all of our different paths intertwine with each other, but from our human perspective, we can only focus on our own path in good faith.
My path is about being self-confident. Other people have their own paths to take. Let’s not get side-tracked by trying to walk someone’s else’s path.
How many people before me have watched the sun come up every morning? I want to be like the steady sun; sometimes cloud covered, sometimes standing alone. Let all of the myriad thoughts and emotions fall in line as planets around an inner source of light.
Being able to see clearly is a great advantage. If I were to sum up what it was all about these past couple of years, I’d say clarity. Mental sharpness and emotional clarity came from it.
The mind is like an infinitely sharp knife. If we were to use such a knife, we’d want to focus on what we were doing. That’s my approach to the way I use my thoughts.
Every day we get to check our map to see if we’re headed in the right direction. We’ll go on many adventures and face many challenges on this journey, but that’s the whole purpose. Life is an odyssey, and we’re on our way home.
Since I enjoy using myself as a self-improvement guinea pig, I thought I’d share my monthly, weekly, and daily goals. Even after many years of self-improvement, I sometimes need to get back to basics. Perhaps seeing me experiment with my own life will enlighten you in some way.
Instead of having too many goals to accomplish in a month, I’ve decided to focus on just one. My goal for January 2017 is to move into my new apartment and have all of the essentials in place (electricity, internet, food, etc).
The week is almost over, but my goal is to begin moving into my new apartment.
The daily goal is basically a to-do list. Things like cash my check, pick up the apartment keys, etc.
As part of my year of re-invention, I’m clarifying, focusing, and simplifying my life. Having a monthly, weekly, and daily goal helps me to be more productive. I believe that being productive and going with the flow can co-exist peacefully.
I work and learn a lot every day; seven days a week. Afterwards, I watch movies, drink beer, and play guitar. When I feel inspired, I blog.
On any given day, I experience things that I love. When I experience things that I don’t love, I practice focusing on the good. This has proven to be powerful.
The things I’ve experienced before the past year have been amazing, but the past year has been even more so. I’ve grown in ways that I used to write about in my journals. I’ve shared my experiences with the readers of my blog for years, and deeply appreciate knowing what I write is connecting with others.