A self–fulfilling prophecy is a prediction that directly or indirectly causes itself to become true, by the very terms of the prophecy itself, due to positive feedback between belief and behavior.
That’s the amazing and also scary thing about self-improvement, which is really another term for truth-seeking; when you have the courage to face the truth about who you truly are, your life will change in miraculous and sometimes terrifying ways.
When I look back at some of the things I wrote down years ago, the power and truth of it takes my breath away. I was intuitively prophesying my own future. It hasn’t always been easy, but it’s been immeasurably meaningful.
Writing and publishing this post will be an achievement for me. It’s helpful to consciously acknowledge when something would be an achievement, and when something has been achieved. An achievement is something we’re proud that we accomplished.
Appreciation is also something we can consciously acknowledge. By “consciously acknowledge” I mean it requires mental focus, and by focusing on the things we appreciate, we attract more of it into our lives. Appreciating is consciously acknowledging and savoring the beauty, worth, and value of something.
Achieving and appreciating are powerful self-improvement techniques. By using both of these mental skills, we can truly create a more positive experience for ourselves, and by extension, a more positive world.
I asked the I Ching:
“What can I do to have courage and strength?”
The answer was so powerful that I had to write it down in my journal so I could internalize it, and I also wanted to type it up on my blog to share it with you, because it’s just good advice in general.
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It is time to eliminate bad habits and behaviors and free yourself from relationships and situations that drag you down. Deliverance requires inner resolution and perseverance. You alone can save yourself. No one else can do it for you. But if you stay the course, people who undermine your self-worth or have an unhealthy influence in your life will see that you cannot be taken advantage of and they will withdraw of their own accord.
“Delivering yourself” means treating yourself with respect and developing a positive attitude toward who you are and what you do. Deliverance requires a narrative of redemption. It means believing in a vision of yourself and in a story of your life in which things can get better. If you hold fast to this vision and make this story your story, your life will indeed improve.
By believing in yourself and becoming committed to your deliverance, you will no longer attract harmful people, and you will no longer get yourself entangled in unhealthy behaviors and difficult circumstances that you could have avoided.
Jack M. Balkin, The Laws of Change
I need to stay focused on this message, because I need courage and strength in order to stay on the right path. After a lifetime of approval seeking and people pleasing, I finally know what it’s like to be free, but there are still backsliding and self-sabotaging habits that I need to be aware of. Only I can save myself.
Being honest with myself and taking the third way.
It’s early in the morning and I talk about being a Libra and an INFP. Existentialism somehow crept in there, too.
There are people who—from a societal standpoint–have more of an obligation to be responsible to their family than me, but they simply don’t care (or let it bog them down) and go about their merry way. On the other hand, as an only child, I’ve felt overly responsible for the happiness of my family, which, of course, happens to be me and my parents. I now realize that I don’t have to be that way, and I can just as easily do whatever I want.
It’s been such a struggle for me to be my own person that I chalk it up to paying off karmic debt. How do I know that I’ve paid off my karmic debt? I don’t feel guilty anymore, and in fact, I’ve replaced any feeling of guilt with anger, which feels a lot better than depression.
Emotional well-being, mental health, and self-improvement is a daily job. Being happy is intrinsically rewarding, and we all deserve to be happy.
I deserve to be a happy.
Breaking the ice, getting my feet, and taking a leap of faith.